While at a family wedding back in late September 2001 and only a month before moving down to Miami, I met a family friend who happens to be a very talented writer.  That writer is Ron Nyswaner, the famed screenwriter of Philadelphia and A Soldier’s Girl, who, in 2004 came out with Blue Days, Black Nights, which tells the tragic love story of his life chasing after an escort for two years and the drugs and seedy life that followed.  This is a raw, gripping, nail-biting novel that exposed the raw emotions, thoughts, and feelings of Ron in hopes of saving or being saved by Johann.     

Maybe you should write the story of my life. 

–Tamas Geletly aka Johann 

Ron wrote this book not as a purge of his feelings for his past, but as a documentation of his history, to leave not one stone left unturned in this brief yet memorable affair that consumed two years of his life.  Ron met Johann back in January of 1996 at a pick up bar in Los Angeles and went through complete hell with him and then without him.  Even though he had had a slew of wonderful companions beforehand, Johann was special and had a bond with Ron that went to the end.  Even while on trips and meeting his friends, he never once alluded to what he was, what the status of their relationship was, or whatever-have-you, it was just fun to let them wonder.  Feeling like his own life was dull and boring, as a writer he used Johann as the muse of the story, bringing excitement to his own life as well.  Even though it was a paying/working relationship, Ron, deep down inside wanted him to save him, but sadly, Johann had his own demons to deal with.    

Someday, you will be a professional Crack Head.

Even on their first encounter together, Ron and Johann had a merry time trying to buy and then use drugs, just to have sex.  At first Johann only got them for Ron, but as time progressed, he was using and not just dealing or procuring them for him. I told you Ronnie, I don’t like drugs. I just do them to make you happy.  I laughed and thought, the title of Chapter Two should be Searching For Soapless Steel Wool in Hollywood, to which Ron laughed.  This is one of those stories about drugs that will make you glad if you have not taken any, happy you survived quitting, and if you are on something, want to get off the ride.  With lines like, As my boyfriend’s moving van pulled out of the driveway—I would no longer have to hide the packets of cocaine at the bottom of my underwear drawer… you can imagine what style of life he took on after that.  Ron explained that the prostitutes were more important than the drugs, but they would be just a powerful sometimes, and when the two danced, it was exhilarating.  What is funny is the fact that as they were filming Philadelphia, he was around the corner scoring something from a known dealer, and, seconds after walking away, the dealer was arrested and yet nothing happened to him.  One time, in Australia, this escort actually helped him with an overdose by going out and getting greasy foods.   

Alcoholism snuck up on me.  It seemed that everyone was drinking but I was the one who crawled under the table to sleep at the feet of my embarrassed friends. (p. 35)  

There are moments in this book that are sweet, tender, and raw—yet there are some really funny lines that you will laugh at and enjoy.  They say that you know a dog trusts you if it will sleep in your presence with both eyes closed.  What does it mean if a man like Johann drifts to sleep while you’re holding his balls? (p. 70)  Then, there goes the mind and paranoia steps in with sentences like, My house is full of windows and I avoided them.  I had the creepy feeling of being watched by the darkness. And finally, while on a drug binge in Key West playing at the pool, and Johann being ogled by other guests, It feels good to have something others want, even if you don’t really have it.   

As far as the prostitution is concerned, his doctor at the time, Dr. Yu, summed it up perfectly, "Prostitute never love customer."  Even as much time as Ron and Johann had spent together, the words never came and always remained a professional relationship at the end of the day.  Johann explained, quite clearly, the most important thing to remember when dealing with the Sex For Trade industry; A Prostitute makes you pay for sex while a Gigolo makes you pay for friendship.  Johann told us the story of how on one Christmas Eve he took in a young rough Hustler off the street for the night and cleaned him up only to wake up the next morning missing such things as his TV.  Ron told me that he trusted him completely and that he would have felt safe leaving over $1,000 on the nightstand and know that he would never take it.  He also told me that he was one of the most brutally honest people, and had the most integrity of anyone he knows, and that the lying he did, only served a purpose. A Hustler is always thinking what more can I get from you and hustles all the time.   

It was great to sit down with Ron, in his house, the house that is semi-pivotal to the book, his home-base of sorts in New York, where he gave me a wonderful tour with his new best friend Spike.  He explained to me some of the subtle things within the book, the drug lifestyle, and most importantly, Escort Etiquette.  We talked about how his family has semi-distanced themselves from him for four lines of the book, that later was taken out of the paperback version, his actual relationships with his brother, Johann’s family, and Ethan, most of which has fizzled away, and all parties have moved on with their lives.  Sadly, he does not see Dr. Yu anymore.   

Since writing this book, he has found a wonderful partner, James, and they have been together for the past five years—Engaged for the past two! Ron has also been writing a lot, and has been featured as a writer in the newest book Paws in Reflection that deal with pet ownership and also a new screenplay for the movie The Painted Veil that stars Naiomi Watts, Edward Norton, and Liev Schreiber that comes out December 22^nd! 

While I was leaving his house, I had thought about some of the places and timeframes he mentioned, and wondered if I actually had run into him, with our gay community being as small as it is in the Hudson Valley, and while walking to the car up the driveway by the barn, in the complete darkness, I felt the darkness.